Story Sixty Four: Noorah from Jordan

I’m 19 years old, heading toward 20. I have a tiny story that needs to be share with someone who will surely understand; someone who can also give me some valuable advice.

It happened a few years ago, at the Dentist’s. I was getting my teeth fixed. The Dentist was a kind one; loving, over-friendly. He was divorced and had two children –so he said. I was fond of him, enjoying the appointments no matter how painful they were. I had tooth abscess, and he took his time through various, consequent sessions to pull all the pus out and help me recover. Toward the beginning, he was very good. My mother accompanied me at the office every time. She always sat in the corner and read the magazine while he was fixing my teeth.

He decided to fix all of my teeth, actually, for lower prices especially for me and my mother.

One time, when he was treating my abscess, he wanted to “stimulate my blood flow” to help get rid of the pus in my teeth. He was a doctor, I was so new to the world (as my parents were over-protective and hardly let me loose until University started). He started touching my chest area underneath the blouse, and my mother was aware. She was fine with it. I was fine with it, too. It really did help my blood flow, helped the treatment. At that time, he also had a needle inside my tooth (as part of the treatment), so I could neither scream nor shout nor shove him away. It was very non-threatening at that time.

By the end of the session, he started touching my breasts. I found that awkward, I was confused and unaware. My mother was busy with the magazine or her phone and did not pay attention.

The next appointment at his office was a mental pain. He repeated the same (the pus had to be pulled out over several sessions). He touched my breasts and was working his way toward my belly. I was still very confused.

The third time, he was finding his way toward my vagina. Specifically the “mons pubis” area, and he never made it further because, even though I could not alert my mother to what was happening, I choose to push his hand away every time. He was trying, of course, not to make a fuss so not to alert my mother. I pushed his hand off my knee, my thigh and the areas below my belly several times. He would look at me and smile. He was trying to shove his hand underneath my pants.

That is the moment I understood what he was trying to do. I was sure, all doubt was gone. I told no one – tried but couldn’t.

Days went on and I forgot that incident although I cannot forget the shitty feeling. Yesterday I found out that my mother is going to the same dentist, and that he has opened up a new clinic.

The old forgotten story came back to me. I told my mother. She told me to dress properly and not talk about it. I told my father. He told me that I cannot issue a report against him since I have no evidence, because it’s been a long time.

I know that I should have reported the incident or told someone back then, but I was silly, young and still growing, and very unaware of the laws against this. I even sort of forgave him at that time. Now I realize that he could be doing this to a girl who is unable to act against this, or worse, even rape a girl at his office. Yet still I see myself forgiven, being at a stage of learning and realizing back then.

I want to report him, but that will not get me anywhere but trouble since, as my father said, I have no solid proof of the incident. My plan now is to go to his office and confront him, and tell him that if I ever hear of a case where a girl has been assaulted by him, I will not be hesitated to testify against him. However, it may not be the best course of action at the moment.

Advice? Help? These are just initial ideas.

lal lilta7arroush

Comments (8)

  • Kandinsky Beaumont

    It is a shame your mother does not stand up for you.
    Go back and ask her to. She should go to another dentist.
    Try to find out if anybody else going to that dentist had a similar experience.

    Very fine of you to write this blogpost. Talking about assault is necessary!
    You are a brave and fine young woman and do not ever let anybody deny that.

    Reply
  • Elizabeth

    Hide a video camera in the roof or wall of his office just a tiny hole. So you can get the evidence you need to get this man to stop. Because he must be stopped before he really hurts so poor little girl….This man is an animal and should be in jail.

    Reply
  • Jihane

    I think you should do a survey about this dentist , I m sure you ll find another similar cases … Or just do your best to tell every one about it , so other girls coulb be aware of it !! It’s a shame ! happened everywhere !!

    Reply
  • Liz P

    Send an anonymous letter to the Dentist’s office saying you know what he is doing and it has to stop. Even better post a sign outside outside his office warning girls that he is a molester. Please do not feel guilty in any way about this, this monster put you in this situation.

    Reply
  • Bea

    I’m not sure about the posting of a sign since it probably would be considered harrassment and reputational damage – at least here in Germany but then I have no idea how such things are dealt with in your country. The same applies to hiding a video camera in his office.

    But in terms of confronting him: If you should do this, then have either a small hidden camera in your purse and/or take someone with you as a witness.

    The best could be, as written in a post above, to ask your mother to change her dentist, to tell people about it, and spread awareness. Just my two cents.

    Best wishes brave woman!

    Reply
  • Vera

    Try to contact someone who is in a position to investigate the dentist. You’re probably not the only one he did this to and unless someone stops him, he will only get worse! Good luck, and try to convince your mother not to see him anymore! Maybe see if there is some sort of online forum, like a review of local dentists or something where you can submit an anonymous post warning others about what he did.

    Reply
  • Musab Al-Ahdab

    Dear Noorah (The Brave Girl),

    first of all, let me thank you for sharing your story, and i believe its so brave of you to let it out after all that time, yes its bad thing to be rememebered, but believe me your story would save and protect a lot of other girls of that monster.

    second thing, am not sure about this but i believe in the Jordanian Law, and i believe if you contacts an authority or the preventive security forces they might take your story seriously and work on setting an ambush for him using one or more of their female agents to take him down when he swallow the bait.

    finally, i will ask some of my friends about this issue and get back to you for more clarifications, am too mad on this idiot and i will do my best to help out.

    my best wishes for you BRAVE GIRL !!!!

    Reply
  • Maria Novoa

    I agree, you could send an anonymous letter saying he must stop harassing and abusing women. Say you have proofs and let him know you aren’t alone, just write you have talked with other women and you have your parents’ support. Thank you for speaking out.

    Reply

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